Recently I found myself confronted with a question, "Who are you REALLY?" This question did not come from some philosophical book but rather a relative/friend of mine, Chelsea. It was interesting that she asked that question because I believe that as a person this is something that we all struggle with at some point.
I struggle horribly with this question at times. I have come to define myself as a mother and a wife. This makes me angry. I get upset at the fact that I have lost who I am in the daily duties that I do. I am a maid, a chauffeur, a personal chef, and a therapist. I am often referred to as LeAnne's mom or Donny's wife. At what point do I get my identity back? At what point do I get to follow my dreams instead of helping everyone else follow their's? The answer to that question is simple.......NOW.
I have decided that I am going to return to school and get my Master's degree in English. Hopefully by this time next year I will be a professor at a community college. Now that my youngest child, Miss Chloe-Marie (and yes that is her first name), is in school for three hours a day I can focus on me for a bit. I guess the main question is still waiting to be answered. Who am I REALLY?
I am an artist. I use my imagination to create stories that the mundane cannot begin to comprehend. I am a tortured soul. A soul that has been through more pain than most people can handle in a lifetime, but I endured most of it before I was 18. I am a teacher. I thrive to educate and guide others in life. I am a mother and a wife. Those are two roles that no matter how much I don't want them to define who I am, they do. Where do these things lead me?
Only time and God can truly answer those questions. All I know for now is that this is who I am.